Sorry to Break it to You, But You Will Never Achieve Your Goals

“You have a purpose!” 

“You are destined for greatness!”

“God has a special plan for your life!”

If you’ve been to any women empowerment event, watched a motivational message, or even scrolled through Dorisma’s social media, you’ve heard all these things before…and I hope by now, you believe them.   

But here’s the caveat: You are incapable of reaching any of the greatness you’ve planned for this year and beyond.

You will not break the cycle of poverty and own that multi-million dollar business. 

You will not turn around and lead a healthier lifestyle and get that dream body.

You will not stop attracting toxic relationships and replace them with healthier ones. 

You will not crush whatever goal found itself on your new year’s resolution yet again,  

This is not to be cynical. Rather, it’s to submit to you that though the you that exists today is incapable. There is a version of you that is.

See, there comes a point in your life where you have to stop, reflect and ask yourself: “ Why haven’t I actualized my dream life yet?”

Yes, there is a such thing as “the process” and the timing not being right. But, sometimes the issue is not any external circumstance. Sometimes, the issue is you. Yes, sometimes you are the drama…and the villain.

It is possible to love yourself while still acknowledging that there are parts of you that can no longer serve you for where you want to be. Those parts must die to give way to a new version of you. 

Some of us will need to die to our laziness, fear of failure, inconsistency, procrastination, or lack of self-control. For others, it may be bitterness, resentment, jealousy, anger, or people-pleasing. The things needed to die may come in the form of things, places, habits, or mindsets. Whatever continues to beset you and separate you from being able to reach your goals, it’s time to kill it!

Killing things isn’t enough though. You’ll need to give birth to something new in replacement. Maybe you plan on killing your procrastination? Perhaps it’s time to birth a daily routine fueled by discipline and not emotions. So you want to kill anxiety and depression? It may be time to birth a  life of talk therapy and even consistent prayer.    

The killing nor the birthing will be an overnight process. You will have to work hard to go against your natural proclivities. It will be uncomfortable, but wouldn’t staying the same be just as uneasy. At least the former would be so much more worth it.  

There is so much beauty in changing. This is the reason why many successful multi-millionaires continue to spend thousands of dollars yearly on personal development classes and workshops. That is because the recognize the need to continuously keep evolving into better versions of themselves. 

In the new year, do not resist change. You are great woman, but there is better version of you that your dreams are requiring. Determine that you will become the person you need to be to see your dreams come true.