March 13, 2020 was the day COVID-19 became real for me.
“Effective immediately, campus will be closing, online instruction will commence, and graduation ceremonies will be indefinitely postponed.”
The final six words spoken by my college’s president sent a crushing blow to my stomach. “Indefinitely postponed? What does that even mean?” I repeatedly asked myself. I wanted a straight answer and not to be left dangling in a world of uncertainty.
For many of us current students and graduates, we know that college can be synonymous with one word…stress. The lengthy papers, the irritating group projects, and the many nights falling asleep with our books in hand are just some of the aspects of the demanding college lifestyle. For years, I fantasized about the day that I would march proudly across center stage, seize my diploma in hand, and pause for the flashing camera lights. However, life is unpredictable and there would be no stage, no hand to shake, and no flashing lights.
As COVID-19 made its unwelcomed entrance into the country, many people suffered other abrupt disruptions in their plans. Weddings were postponed, vacations cancelled, and tragically, millions of jobs lost. Everyone was forced to stay home and thus, #quarantine made its permanent dwelling into our vocabulary. Subsequently, the fear, anxiety, and uncertainty brought on by the onset of the pandemic diminished the mental health of many people, including myself.
My negative thoughts and emotions toward the pandemic grew immensely and quickly. I was upset, afraid, and perplexed. This moment was different from anything that our living generation had ever experienced. I had so many questions that did not have simple answers. “Why me? Why this year? What horrible thing is going to happen next?”
After a few weeks in quarantine, my mental health had deteriorated. However, a change in perspective ultimately saved me from my own thoughts. I realized that protection, reflection, and modification could help how I was feeling.
Protection from Negativity
Without separation from one another, many more people would have fallen ill to COVID-19 due to its highly contagious nature. Ultimately, we needed to quarantine away from others in order to protect our health and wellness from the life-threatening disease.
While isolation may be considered a negative quality in the mental health community, I have found it can also be beneficial in some ways. I think it personally depends on what we are isolating from. While I was in quarantine, I realized that I felt protected from a lot of negativity that I faced in the outside world. Also, I noticed I felt less pressure to act in ways or be in situations that didn’t align with my values.
I realized that removing myself from negative people and situations greatly improved my mental health. Since I was graduating, I decided to make purposeful decisions about which friends I would carry into my next season in life.
I’m learning it’s important to be aware of who is around us and the environments we choose to inhabit, and try to minimize the influences in our lives which feel toxic. My mental health has improved greatly from this awareness.
Reflection on What I Have Been Given
A few days after my university president’s announcement, I quickly realized how ungrateful I was acting. Yes, an important moment in my life was stripped away from me, but people were suffering from far worse. Every time I turned on the news, the death toll grew by the hundreds. Next, I began to see messages on social media from friends who lost loved ones. It was heartbreaking.
I started to reflect on my life and everything I had. My family and I were healthy. I had a roof over my head and a multitude of food in my kitchen. I decided that the attitude that I had showcased earlier was unacceptable. My self-loathing and questioning God quickly turned into shouts of praise and prayers of thankfulness. This newfound gratitude helped release my pessimistic thoughts and reduced my feelings of anxiety.
How often do you stop to reflect on your blessings? When you do, I hope you will find just how fortunate you are. Gratitude changed my entire perspective during quarantine and led me to a more content and healthy mental state.
Modification of My Daily Habits
Just like our society is adapting to new safety-measures, sometimes we have to change our habits in order for things to get better. In the midst of quarantine, I became stuck in the same overall basic routine:
Wake up. Read my devotions. Run/Exercise. Eat. Netflix. Sleep. Repeat.
I needed an adjustment. I changed the order of my activities, I made a conscious effort to spend more time with my family, and I texted with my friends more. These small details gave me a fresh new start and helped me break out of a routine. Modification is beneficial for improvement. It can really help to look at our routines and see if they are serving us or if switching it up would help.
I cannot wait to tell my grandchildren about how I was quarantined for months with no food, no shelter… okay that’s a gross exaggeration, but the story of 2020 will be an epic one. Most importantly, I would want them to know about how I was mentally able to overcome it all. As we fight this pandemic, let’s continue to fight to protect our mental health. If we remain strong mentally, we will have that much more strength to help us overcome anything else the year 2020 brings.
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